young and inaction

Chapter 53

People can't live with their own daydreams.

It was still daylight, and birdsong could be heard outside the window in the ward.The pain on his wrist was something he had never experienced before. This kind of pain was an unforgettable pain.

The back of his right hand was a little purple, which was the reason for his frequent infusions.All kinds of drugs made him look like a bamboo pole. He was too thin, and the doctor gave him an needle to support his hand, and he always felt painful.

Maybe it was because of excessive blood loss, he felt very tired, his eyelids were heavy, and his eyeballs were sore and swollen. Although the dream was dark, he didn't want to wake up. He comforted himself: "Sleep, sleep, if you don't sleep, you can do it again." what to do?

Lu Xichou sat by the bed, waiting for Lin Xingxiu to wake up.This was the third day after Lin Xingxiu committed suicide by slashing his wrist. Lu Xichou went home and planned to take online classes as usual, but Liu Yun told him that something happened to Lin Xingxiu as soon as he entered the door.

It was obviously three days ago, but Lu Yang didn't tell him earlier, Lu Xichou didn't feel anything, he didn't care about what tricks Lu Yang was playing again, and ran out the door with his bag on his back.

He rode his bicycle to the nursing home, and as soon as he left the gate of the community, he ran into Lu Yang. The window of the car fell down, revealing Lu Yang's face. He glanced at Lu Xichou and said, "Get in the car."

Another car came back, Lu Xichou parked Cheng next to the security room, opened the door and sat in the passenger seat.Xiao Hu asked with a smile: "Where is Xichou going in such a hurry?"

Before Lu Xichou could answer, Lu Yang who was sitting in the back said: "Nursing home." Hearing these three words, Lu Xichou looked at Lu Yang from the rearview mirror in disbelief.

Xiao Hu turned the steering wheel skillfully and went to the nursing home. Xiao Hu didn't know which nursing home, so he asked, "Which nursing home does sir go to?"

This time it was Lu Xichou who answered: "City City Nursing Home...can you hurry up?" Lu Xichou said and looked up at Lu Yang. Lu Yang set the speed in the car, and Xiao Hu didn't dare to change without his order.

"Oh, then..." Forget it, before saying anything, Lu Yang said again: "The sooner the better."

They perfectly avoided all rush hours and arrived at the nursing home in about 10 minutes.Lu Yang sat in the car, waited for Lu Xichou to get out of the car, and hurried into the ward before he got out of the car and went to the attending doctor.

The ward is very quiet, only the sound of equipment working.The person on the bed was wearing an oxygen mask, breathing heavily, and his brows were furrowed, as if he was having a nightmare.

Looking at Lin Xingxiu's appearance, he felt sad for a while, why did something happen again?He gently stroked the pinhole on his right hand, how pitiful it was.He could have lived happily like his peers.

Lin Xingxiu's left hand was stuffed under the quilt, but Lu Xichou didn't see it, he observed Lin Xingxiu, but he didn't see anything wrong there.He held Lin Xingxiu's hand tightly, waiting for Lin Xingxiu to wake up.

There was a knock on the door, Lu Xichou went to open the door, made a "shh" gesture, the nurse who entered the door understood, walked over softly, observed the instrument for a while, then turned off the instrument, and took out Lin Xingxiu from the quilt left hand.

Breathing stopped at this second, Lu Xichou couldn't believe his eyes, he stared straight at the red gauze.Before the nurse could stabilize her hand, Lu Xichou grabbed her wrist and pulled her out of the ward.

"What happened to him?" Lu Xichou asked.

The nurse had a regretful expression on her face and told the story intermittently in Chinese. Lu Xichou got the general idea, but he couldn't figure out why Lin Xingxiu suddenly wanted to commit suicide.

"Depression, all these related tendencies." The nurse said.

Depression, autism... why does this world have such mental illness? !Since God has decided to "fail" Lin Xingxiu, why can't Lin Xingxiu live a happier life.

"I see, thank you." Lu Xichou said in English, then with a weary smile, he opened the door and entered the ward.

Lin Xingxiu didn't wake up that night, and the doctor told him that it was very likely that Lin Xingxiu would become lethargic.Lu Yang had already gone home. Before he left, he came to the ward, took away the folder from the drawer, stood at the door and said, "Let's leave the hospital when he wakes up."

From that day on, Lu Yang seemed to be a different person. Before, he seemed to be obsessed with something, but now he didn't care much, as if he practiced Zen overnight and realized the truth.

"Why? Dad?" Lu Xichou was a little puzzled, more of a disbelief.Lu Yang sighed, turned to Lu Xichou, smiled, and the wrinkles on his forehead became more obvious, and said: "I have done everything I can, let everything go with the wind, it is my debt to you that your mother and I have been together for so many years. of."

It wasn't until the sound of closing the door that he regained consciousness that it was not a dream.

Lu Yang asked for leave for Lu Xichou. Lin Xingxiu woke up a few days ago, but he always stared at the ceiling without saying a word. No matter how Lu Xichou teased him, he remained expressionless.

On the day when Lin Xingxiu was fully awake, the doctor changed his gauze again, arranged a few precautions, and took Lu Xichou to go through the discharge procedures.

He really didn't expect to go out so soon. When Lu Xichou went to go through the formalities, he walked into the yard, and painted the pavilion with his eyes. Standing downstairs, he looked up at a window on the fifth floor, which made him understand. many things.

"Let's go, where do you want to go?" Lu Xichou saw Lin Xingxiu when he came out of the hall, walked up, put his arms around Lin Xingxiu's shoulder and asked: "The doctor said you don't want to eat spicy food, I'll eat some light food stuff, and go home?"

go home?Which home do you want to go to?

Lin Xingxiu looked at Lu Xichou, and asked, "Go home?" Lu Xichou pinched his earlobe, and said, "Go back to the rental house." Oh, it was the so-called [-] yuan per month rental house, he didn't say anything, any Lu Xichou pulled him.

During the meal, Lin Xingxiu seemed to inadvertently ask: "Is it really five hundred?" Lu Xichou took a sip of the juice, looked at Lin Xingxiu, and then laughed: "Really, don't you believe it?"

I don't believe it anymore, although I have believed it before.

The rental house was still the same, Ha Xian was taken home by Lu Xichou, and he had a great time playing with Tuan Tuan every day.Lu Xichou adjusted the hot water and said, "That's it, the water temperature is just right."

Lin Xingxiu nodded, and said after a few seconds: "It doesn't have to be like this in the future." Lu Xichou was so dizzy by his words that he overflowed his teacup when pouring water, what's wrong?

Locking himself in a closed space alone, Lin Xingxiu felt very at ease, at least it made him feel more secure than walking on the street full of strangers.

Before going to bed, Lin Xingxiu asked Lu Xichou to go home, but Lu Xichou refused, and he asked with a deadpan face, "Then what I said before still counts?" Lin Xingxiu didn't know which sentence he was referring to.

Seeing Lin Xingxiu's expression, Lu Xichou said softly, "Do you still agree with me chasing you?" Lin Xingxiu was stunned for a moment, then nodded and said, "Yes."

He dare not refuse.

Lu Xichou smiled and pulled Lin Xingxiu towards him, and the latter staggered into Lu Xichou's arms. Lu Xichou lowered his head and kissed gently on his lips, as if comforting and apologetic.

When the matter developed a step further, Lin Xingxiu pushed Lu Xichou away, he quickly entered the room, opened the door and said, "It's very late, you haven't been home for a few days, go home first."

The lights in the living room were turned off, only the lights in the room were left, reflecting on Lu Xichou's face.Looking at Lin Xingxiu's expression, he wanted to cry and laugh, but finally he could only give up and said, "Okay, tomorrow is just Saturday, I'll take you to the beach last time, how about it?"

This sea is a few days after Lu Xichou said that he planned to chase Lin Xingxiu, he suddenly decided to take Lin Xingxiu to play, and said it was a date.They played late that day and had a great time.

In order to let him go quickly, Lin Xingxiu nodded decisively in agreement.Maybe it was "reunion after a broken mirror", Lu Xichou was in a good mood, he smiled with satisfaction, and said to Lin Xingxiu, "Goodbye, good night."

He closed the door for Lin Xingxiu and left.

The room has returned to tranquility, and now there is only one sound of breathing left.Lin Xingxiu sat on the edge of the bed with his knees hugged. He was wearing long-sleeved pajamas, and he was still wearing short-sleeved pajamas at this time last year.

He doesn't know what to do. Does it mean he can live a normal life after being discharged from the hospital?No, it doesn't mean that he knows what kind of disease he has, and he can feel it no matter how sick it is.

Originally, he put the medicine bottle on the bedside table, but Lu Xichou put it away with a "tsk" when he saw it, and found a large storage box in the storage room, which was just enough to put all the medicines.

The storage box has two layers, the first layer is the medicine he should take on time, and the second layer is sleeping pills.Lu Xichou pointed to the sleeping pill and said, "If you don't want to take this medicine, don't take it. If you can't sleep, I will stay with you."

Because Lin Xingxiu had suicidal "inclinations", the doctor reduced the dosage of sleeping pills prescribed for him by half to avoid unnecessary consequences, which would benefit everyone.

He got up and went to the living room to pour a glass of cold water, took a sip, and felt very comfortable in his stomach.He found the storage box with the cup in his hand, opened the second floor directly, looked at the plastic medicine bottle in a daze, and buttoned the English words on the bottle one by one.

Odd numbers means eating, even numbers means not eating, and after translating the last word, it is an even number.He learned to accept his fate, opened the bottle cap and poured out a few pills, took it with a drink of water, and then lay down on the bed.

Sure enough, when the watch indicated 00:00, he still didn't feel sleepy at all. If he couldn't fall asleep, he would be irritable, and he would feel that he was "retrograde" with people all over the world.

Even sometimes, Lin Xingxiu felt that his life was a waste of resources.It was near dawn that Lin Xingxiu felt sleepy, and he performed very well, at least he slept for more than 20 minutes.

He didn't get up, he was waiting for Lu Xichou to come, creating an illusion, making himself look like he fell asleep and woke up naturally.

Lu Xichou came early and brought breakfast, when he entered the door he signaled Ha Xian not to make a sound.Holding Haxian in his arms, he tiptoedly opened the door and let Haxian in.

Haxian hasn't seen Lin Xingxiu for so long, and he still remembers his smell. He was already very excited to come back to this home, and when he smelled his mother's smell again, he would bark and bark.

Jumped onto the bed and started licking Lin Xingxiu's face.

Lin Xingxiu already knew when they entered the gate, he just closed his eyes and pretended to be asleep, and then pretended to be woken up by Ha Xian, rubbed his "bleary" sleepy eyes, and said, "Ha Xian."

"Ha Xian, go down!" Lu Xichou pushed the door open and came in, pretending to scold: "Mom hasn't woken up yet, go out first! Today is too bad!"

Ha Xian thought his father was really angry, moved the lump of love on his buttocks, Lin Xingxiu smiled softly, this smile was really fleeting.

"It's so early." Lin Xingxiu gestured to get up, but Lu Xichou shut Ha Xian out and said, "Don't get up first."

"Of course I miss you. I made up lessons last night and went to your favorite shop to buy breakfast early this morning." Lu Xichou took off his slippers and went to bed.

"Don't... um..." Before Lin Xingxiu finished speaking, Lu Xichou oppressed him and stuck it on his lips. Lin Xingxiu frowned, he seemed to be a little bit rebellious, and Lu Xichou was not unaware of it, he Just don't want to part so soon.

Both were 17-year-old boys, and the temperature in the room began to heat up.This time it was Lu Xichou who left first, he propped his arms and looked at Lin Xingxiu whose face was red and his eyes were flushed, he felt different feelings, two kinds of feelings.

Lu Xichou rubbed Lin Xingxiu's hair, and said: "Hey, get up, and go play after dinner." Lin Xingxiu washed up, and Lu Xichou leaned on the door frame and looked at him. He was dragging his face while eating breakfast look at him.

"Can I... still go to school?" Lin Xingxiu asked after taking a sip of soy milk.Lu Xichou seemed to have been ordered, he said: "If you want to go, you can go, if you don't want to go, you can learn at home."

When he goes to school, he has to face more things. It is conceivable how the school will pass him on.Lin Xingxiu shook his head and said, "Let's talk about it."

Lu Xichou glanced at the time, picked out a suit of clothes for Lin Xingxiu, then nodded in satisfaction, and said, "This is how you are handsome and full of vigor!"

He has been in crowded places for a long time, which makes him feel nervous and wanders from time to time.Lu Xichou wants to take him to see a shadow puppet show performed by Grandpa Mibojun.

The plot was very exciting, but Lin Xingxiu was immersed in his own world, and he didn't remember a word, only heard the applause and cheers at the end.After leaving the stage, Lu Xichou took him to the backstage to meet Mi Bojun's grandfather.

Grandpa Mi is 66 years old. He loves shadow puppets very much and has made many kinds of shadow puppets.The shadow puppets are placed on transparent display shelves by category, including ancient mythological figures and Western European figures, and the last shelf is cartoon characters.

"Xiao Lu is here!" Grandpa Mi's voice was surprisingly gentle, and it was very thick when he was performing on stage.Lu Xichou walked over with a smile, and took out a box of tea from his bag.

"Grandpa, this time it's not just me, there's another one." Lu Xichou pulled Lin Xing and said, "This is the first grader in our school, my... good friend."

Grandpa Mi put on his presbyopic glasses, and looked at Lin Xingxiu carefully: "Then this head is ten times taller than millet, right? Hahaha." Lu Xichou also laughed.

"Hello, Grandpa." Lin Xingxiu greeted.

Grandpa Mi sat down and talked to the two about the origin, history and culture of shadow puppetry. Lu Xichou agreed with the truth, and Lin Xingxiu only nodded at the right time.

When it was time for dinner, Grandpa Mi left two of them to go home for dinner, saying that Grandma cooked authentic Sichuan cuisine, which most people could not eat. When Lu Xichou and Lin Xingxiu were about to refuse, Mi Bojun came back with a bag on his back.

Before entering the door, grandpa, grandpa shouted, like a gourd baby saving grandpa, if the real grandpa wasn't here, Lu Xichou would definitely agree, lest the grandson would cry when he couldn't find his grandpa.

It took a long time for Grandpa Mi to answer: "Hey, why are you shouting so loudly? Grandpa is not deaf!" Mi Bojun came into the room laughing, saw Lu Xichou sitting on the edge of the sofa, and joked: "Hey, this Grandpa is a rare visitor!"

In a blink of an eye, he saw the familiar yet unfamiliar voice inside, and blurted out swear words: "Damn it? The old man inside is even a rare visitor!" Regardless of Grandpa Mi scolding him, he first pulled Lu Xichou and whispered: "Lin Xingxiu Why are you here?"

Lu Xichou just smiled at him, is this the so-called mysterious smile? !

When Miber County came, they were destined not to leave.The restaurant that was originally scheduled to be at the seaside was canceled by Lu Xichou in the car when he was going to Grandpa Mi's house.

The theater is not far from Grandpa Mi's house. Grandpa Mi lives separately from the Mibojun family. The old couple are used to living in the family courtyard, and the neighbors in the courtyard have lived together for decades, and they don't want to move to high-rise buildings.

Grandma Mi always said, don't say I'm uneducated, I live in a high-rise building, I can't touch the ground, I can't stand the sky above, and I don't feel at ease.

When they arrived home, Lu Xichou and Lin Xingxiu walked at the back, and a neighbor came out to say hello. Lu Xichou noticed Lin Xingxiu's strangeness, took his hand, rubbed his thumb lightly and said: " Believe me, Grandma Miber County is a nice person, just like my grandma, in short, you can't go wrong with her as your grandma."

When calling, grandma heard that Xiao Lu and her classmates were coming, and she was very excited. She set up the dishes early and waited for them to come back.This would be standing in the doorway, wearing an apron, waving to them.

"Xiao Lu!" Grandma shouted. Grandma liked him very much, and his eloquence made grandma laugh every time.

Mibojun curled his lips and complained, and said, "Who is the grandson?" Grandma quickly grabbed Mibojun and said, "Hey, they are all grandma's heart!" Grandma saw Lin Xingxiu next to him, and asked, "This is Xiaolin Right? Hey, you're so handsome! You have pretty features, but you're a little thinner."

Grandpa gave Lin Xingxiu a thumbs-up, and said, "Hey, don't underestimate Xiao Lin, this kid has a clever mind, he can beat Xiaomi by ten!"

Lin Xingxiu said hello and was dragged into the house by his grandmother.During this period, Lin Xingxiu looked back at Lu Xichou as if asking for help, but the man winked at him, meaning that it was all right, grandma was so hospitable.

The group of them sat around a round table, an atmosphere that Lin Xingxiu and Lu Xichou seldom experienced, one was the family rules, the other was that the family conditions did not allow it.

To be honest, Lin Xingxiu really likes this feeling, but only before.Now he is sitting here, like suffering.However, his acting skills are very good, on the surface he still accepts it happily, and is trying his best to blend in.

Grandma is an authentic Sichuanese and can eat spicy food.Lu Xichou told him a few non-spicy dishes on the table, but Lin Xingxiu still felt that the spicy food was unbearable after a few mouthfuls.

Grandma saw Lin Xingxiu's appearance, and he stretched out his hand to pick up the vegetables with the bandage on his sleeve, and suddenly put down the chopsticks, left the dining table and said, "I forgot to turn off the fire, turn off the fire."

Grandpa smiled and said: "It's okay, grandma has a bad memory, and I can't even count how many years we have been married!" Grandma heard someone say bad things about her in the kitchen, so she rushed to grandpa in the kitchen.The three children also followed the grandfather and laughed.

Grandma turned off the fire for a long time, and those who didn't know thought it was going to the kitchen to put out the fire. Miber County said he would go and see, and grandma had already come out with two dishes.

"Grandma, there are enough dishes on the table, why did you make two more!" Mibo County completely doubted whether he was his grandson.Grandma's next sentence made him even more suspicious.

"It's not for you!" Grandma carried the dish over to Mibo County, put the dish on the table with a smile and said, "Here, Xiao Lin, eat this if you think it's spicy. It's not good to eat too much spicy. Grandma is reckless, she shouldn't make so many spicy dishes."

Lin Xingxiu stood up, quickly got up and waved his hands and said, "Thank you grandma, I was the one who was reckless... I'm new here." Grandma held his left wrist and said, "This child, why are you being polite to grandma!"

The two dishes were served with rice, Lin Xingxiu put them in the bowl, and the tip of his nose felt a little sour.Lu Xichou touched his leg under the table and asked, "How is it? Grandma is fine?"

Lin Xingxiu exhaled, nodded and said, "En."

Grandpa and grandma reminded him of Lin Jingtang.

After dinner, grandpa was arranged by grandma to wash the dishes, and he sat in the living room chatting with the three children, and even asked Lu Xichou to play the violin, which Lu Xichou gave grandma.

The first time he came to Grandpa Mi's house, grandma heard that Lu Xichou was very good at playing the violin, so she asked her if she was too late to learn?The next time Lu Xichou came here, he gave grandma a violin, and grandma happily showed off to the grandma of the square dance team, saying that it was given to her by a good grandson of hers.

This song is the one performed by Lu Xichou for Lin Xingxiu in the National Day Performance. Hearing this song again, Lin Xingxiu only felt his scalp go numb. When he heard this song for the first time, everything was so good. His There is still a future, and ideals.

When it was time for the two elderly people to take their lunch break, the three children consciously bid farewell and left.When leaving, grandma stuffed Lin Xingxiu with a small red lucky bag, saying it was for safety.

Mibo County was eating popsicles bought from the grocery store, and asked: "Where are we going next?" Lu Xichou seemed to be mentally retarded, eating popsicles this season, but this is not the point, he said: "Us? Who will follow us?"

"I'm going on a date with classmate Lin." Lu Xichou grabbed Lin Xingxiu's wrist and stood on the side of the road to take a taxi.I'm envious of others, but it's a pity that Li Yi has music class today.

"Where are you going?" Mibershire asked.Lu Xichou thought he had too many things to do, and said, "Beach." Today's weather is not bad, Mi Bojun thought for a while and said, "Riding my Dabai? How romantic?"

Dabai is a small tram in Mibershire. It is white, and there is a round storage box at the back, on which Dabai is painted by himself.

This was a good proposal, and Lu Xichou agreed very much. He asked Lin Xingxiu to wait for him here, and within a few minutes Lu Xichou rode out with a white helmet on his bike.

On the top of the hat, there is also a little yellow duck wearing a hard hat, and there is a bamboo dragonfly on its hard hat.Lu Xichou whistled at him, and stopped perfectly in front of Lin Xingxiu.

"Be careful." Lin Xingxiu took the helmet from Lu Xichou. His helmet was sky blue with only a bamboo dragonfly on top.When Lin Xingxiu bowed his head to buckle his helmet strap, Lu Xichou took out a Polaroid from his bag.

With a "click", Lin Xingxiu raised his head, with an indistinct smile on the corner of his mouth, he asked, "Is your bag a treasure chest?" Lu Xichou twisted the key and said, "Of course, do you know? Even if it is a treasure chest, It can't change you inside."

do you know?Even if it's a treasure chest, it can't change you in it.How easy to understand, Lu Xichou is telling Lin Xingxiu that you are unique.

"Sit tight, hold on tight, fasten your seat belt." Lu Xichou moved a distance away and said, "My waist is the seat belt." Lin Xingxiu hesitated for a moment, but still hugged him.

Lu Xichou raised the corners of his mouth and said with a smile, "I wish you a pleasant journey!"